Xiao Ming was a handsome boy. Unfortunately, he was rather vain too. He spent hours looking at himself in the mirror and complimenting himself on his good looks. One day, he played the part of a bespectacled boy in a school play. As the audience filed out of the auditorium, he overheard a snatch of conversation: “my, but didn’t that boy look good in glasses..”
Xiao Ming swelled with pride. From that day onwards, he did his best to spoil his eyesight. He did his homework in dimly-lit conditions, he lay down on the bed to read, he sat very close to the television while watching cartoons, and spent the afternoons playing computer games instead of playing football like he used to. At first, his mother gently admonished him, but her advice fell on deaf ears. After that, like so many mothers today, she merely shrugged her shoulders and said, “What can I do? He doesn’t want to listen.” And left it at that.
Not surprisingly, Xiao Ming’s vision deteriorated. Soon he couldn’t see more than a few metres ahead and had to copy from his neighbour as he couldn’t see the writing on the blackboard. When he walked into the door by accident one day, his mother hurried him to the optician. There, Xiao Ming was fitted with glasses that had a power of 1000 for both eyes. His mother then moaned that glasses nowadays were so expensive.
The next day, Xiao Ming wore his glasses proudly to school. It was quite nice to be able to see where he was going for a change. He took out his pencil sharpener a dozen times a day so he could look at himself on the mirror attached to it. After school, he made a detour to the photo shop to have his photo taken as a commemoration of this great occasion.
Much to his chagrin however, nobody complimented him on his new look. His mother merely said several times a week, “I told you so many times but you never listened. Now I have to spend so much money on glasses for you.” His father said, “Oh, are you wearing glasses nowadays?” then rushed off to work. His classmates said, “Wow, your glasses are so thick! You’ve really spoilt your eyes, haven’t you!”
As the novelty wore off, Xiao Ming began to find his glasses a cumbersome liability. He regretted his foolishness in spoiling his eyes. He resolved never to behave so rashly again and set about finding books on eyesight improvement.
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
Sunday, June 15, 2008
Mrs Tan And The Old Wives' Tales
One day, as Mrs Tan rummaged through a pile of old books and papers her neighbour had given her to throw out, she came upon a dusty, yellowed book entitled, "Old Wives' Tales For Old Wives". It was a short publication and Mrs Tan read it from cover to cover. As a consequence, she came away with her head full of old wives' tales which she implicitly believed.
The next day, Mrs Tan bought a compass. She checked which way the house was facing and was relieved to find that it wasn't North. While she was outside she suddenly noticed though, to her shock and horror, that the number of her house was 84! Mrs Tan wasted no time. With the help of double-sided tape and a piece of A4 paper, she covered up the offending number with a sign that read 83A.
Then she went to the shops to buy a pineapple because it symbolised good luck, and a pomelo because she just felt like eating one. She also bought *pau for Ah Boy and Ah Girl's lunch before heading home. As she walked home, pleased with her purchases, she suddenly saw a black cat crossing the road in front of her.
Mrs Tan stopped short. Her heart began to pound and her breathing came in short, sharp gasps. She stared around her wildly but there was nowhere to run to. So Mrs Tan did what she thought was the next best thing: She shut her eyes tight and repeated to herself, “No see evil, no see evil, no see evil...” Fortunately, the cat went away and she got home without further mishap.
The next thing happened while Mrs Tan was sweeping the floor. While trying not to step on the cracks, she accidentally swept her own foot with the broom. Full of dismay, Mrs Tan stared accusingly at the broom and put it away. She didn't have the heart to sweep any more. Instead, she went to the kitchen to peel off the pau skin for Ah Girl and Ah Boy. 'This was because she had heard that pau makers used to spit on or breathe over the pau skins and she wasn't taking any chances.
That afternoon, it rained just as Mr Tan was due to come home. Mrs Tan was a very good wife. She didn't want her husband to get wet opening the gate, so she opened it for him. Unfortunately, she got drenched in the process. You see, she didn't dare to open the umbrella in the house, or even in the porch, for that matter. So she stood outside the compound, opened the umbrella, and then only proceeded to open the gates wide for Mr Tan to drive straight in.
That night, Mrs Tan was sneezing violently. She had caught a cold. To make matters worse, the rest of the family seemed to be oblivious to the warnings of the old wives’ tales. This vexed her a great deal. To start with, when she went into the kitchen, she caught Ah Boy playing at helmets with the pomelo skin. She gasped and lunged at him, ripping it off his head lest he become bald. Then Ah Girl remembered she had to cut her nails because the discipline teacher was doing a spot check the next day. While she carefully clipped and filed her nails, poor Mrs Tan hid in the kitchen chewing away nervously at the hem of her skirt.
Just when she thought it was safe to come out, she heard Mr Tan whistling a merry little tune. She rushed over to where he was standing in the backyard contemplating the night skies and begged him not to whistle anymore. Mr Tan stopped whistling at once. He didn't like to see his wife looking so harassed, so he put his arm around her and tried to comfort her. Unfortunately he picked the worst possible subject. "Look at the full moon," he began, pointing as he spoke. Mrs Tan screamed and tore herself away. She ran into her room and burst into tears. Mr Tan rushed after her. In between sobs and sneezes, the story came out.
Mr Tan spent quite a long time talking to his wife. He brought her another book entitled "Don't Let Superstition Take Over Your Life" and sat with her while she read it. It was a short publication and she read it from cover to cover. At the end of it, she put down the book thoughtfully and said, "Ya hor. Maybe I go too far."
From then on, Mrs Tan was more careful about what she believed. She found that this improved her quality of life as well. However, it has to be admitted that she never ever whistled at night. Just in case.
*Pau – Chinese steamed bun with filling.
The next day, Mrs Tan bought a compass. She checked which way the house was facing and was relieved to find that it wasn't North. While she was outside she suddenly noticed though, to her shock and horror, that the number of her house was 84! Mrs Tan wasted no time. With the help of double-sided tape and a piece of A4 paper, she covered up the offending number with a sign that read 83A.
Then she went to the shops to buy a pineapple because it symbolised good luck, and a pomelo because she just felt like eating one. She also bought *pau for Ah Boy and Ah Girl's lunch before heading home. As she walked home, pleased with her purchases, she suddenly saw a black cat crossing the road in front of her.
Mrs Tan stopped short. Her heart began to pound and her breathing came in short, sharp gasps. She stared around her wildly but there was nowhere to run to. So Mrs Tan did what she thought was the next best thing: She shut her eyes tight and repeated to herself, “No see evil, no see evil, no see evil...” Fortunately, the cat went away and she got home without further mishap.
The next thing happened while Mrs Tan was sweeping the floor. While trying not to step on the cracks, she accidentally swept her own foot with the broom. Full of dismay, Mrs Tan stared accusingly at the broom and put it away. She didn't have the heart to sweep any more. Instead, she went to the kitchen to peel off the pau skin for Ah Girl and Ah Boy. 'This was because she had heard that pau makers used to spit on or breathe over the pau skins and she wasn't taking any chances.
That afternoon, it rained just as Mr Tan was due to come home. Mrs Tan was a very good wife. She didn't want her husband to get wet opening the gate, so she opened it for him. Unfortunately, she got drenched in the process. You see, she didn't dare to open the umbrella in the house, or even in the porch, for that matter. So she stood outside the compound, opened the umbrella, and then only proceeded to open the gates wide for Mr Tan to drive straight in.
That night, Mrs Tan was sneezing violently. She had caught a cold. To make matters worse, the rest of the family seemed to be oblivious to the warnings of the old wives’ tales. This vexed her a great deal. To start with, when she went into the kitchen, she caught Ah Boy playing at helmets with the pomelo skin. She gasped and lunged at him, ripping it off his head lest he become bald. Then Ah Girl remembered she had to cut her nails because the discipline teacher was doing a spot check the next day. While she carefully clipped and filed her nails, poor Mrs Tan hid in the kitchen chewing away nervously at the hem of her skirt.
Just when she thought it was safe to come out, she heard Mr Tan whistling a merry little tune. She rushed over to where he was standing in the backyard contemplating the night skies and begged him not to whistle anymore. Mr Tan stopped whistling at once. He didn't like to see his wife looking so harassed, so he put his arm around her and tried to comfort her. Unfortunately he picked the worst possible subject. "Look at the full moon," he began, pointing as he spoke. Mrs Tan screamed and tore herself away. She ran into her room and burst into tears. Mr Tan rushed after her. In between sobs and sneezes, the story came out.
Mr Tan spent quite a long time talking to his wife. He brought her another book entitled "Don't Let Superstition Take Over Your Life" and sat with her while she read it. It was a short publication and she read it from cover to cover. At the end of it, she put down the book thoughtfully and said, "Ya hor. Maybe I go too far."
From then on, Mrs Tan was more careful about what she believed. She found that this improved her quality of life as well. However, it has to be admitted that she never ever whistled at night. Just in case.
*Pau – Chinese steamed bun with filling.
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